Rule representation about foma HOT 3 OPEN

I have reformulated the question so maybe it is more understandable:

I have a language that can basically be in the next form:

ROOT+S36+S35+S34.......+S15+S14.........+S2+S1

but there are restrictions that make the root appear with only some suffixes 
and not with all the 36, for instance:

[ ~$[S36 ?* [S20|S12|S2]];  ! S36 can not combine with S20, S12 or S2
[S14 => ?* _ ?* S7 ?*]; ! Every time that S14 appears, S7 must also appear
[[S10 => ?* S12 ?* _ ?* S8] | [S10 => ?* _ ?* S7 ?*]]; ! Every time S10 
appears, it must appear either between S12 and S8, or with S7
etc.
and here comes the one I don't know how to express in regex:

! Every time the sequence [?* S36 ?* S20 ?* S5 ?*] appears, it must appear S8 
between S20 and S5, like this: [?* S36 ?* S20 ?* S8 ?* S5 ?*]

That is the question, and thanks again......

First, this part:

[S10 => ?* S12 ?* _ ?* S8] | [S10 => ?* _ ?* S7 ?*]

should probably read:

[S10 => S12 ?* _ ?* S8 ,  _  ?* S7]

(that's how two contexts are specified; also you don't need ?* at edges)

The actual question is: when you see ?* S36 ?* S20 ?* S5 ?*, S8 must appear 
between S20 and S5. This seems like it's doable without context restriction, 
like so:

~$[?* S36 ?* S20 ~$S8 S5 ?*]

Ok, thanks a lot for the two things, great! I see it now!